Mardi - “I’m learning to listen to my body instead of fighting it, and that healing isn’t about finally loving every part of yourself all the time.”
A little about Mardi:
My name is Mardi, though some people know me as “The Michigan Girl.” I’m the business owner behind Michigan Girl, Michigan Music, and Michigan Small Business Solutions, while also maintaining a full-time career of over 30 years. I’m an entrepreneur, Michigan traveler, dog-mom, Peer Recovery Coach, and creative writer currently working toward publishing my first book. I also stay involved in the recovery community through Mid Michigan Recovery Services Alumni Committee, Lifeboat Addiction Recovery Services Board of Directors, and Face Addiction Now in Ingham County.
Over the years, I’ve worn many hats—daughter, wife, step-mom, caregiver, entrepreneur, and supporter—but underneath all of that, I’ve also been someone trying to figure out who I am. A lot of my healing journey has involved reconnecting with myself, my emotions, and my body after years of disconnecting from all three.
Broken Mirror Q & A
When did you first become aware of your body in a meaningful or difficult way?
I became aware of my body at a young age, but that awareness intensified as I got older and moved through major life changes. I was always conscious of how women are expected to look, and how quickly worth can become tied to appearance, weight, aging, or desirability.
One area where I especially felt pressure to “look” a certain way was professionally—both in my career and while building public-facing businesses and brands. There’s often an expectation for women to appear polished, confident, attractive, energetic, and put together at all times, even when internally they may be overwhelmed or struggling.
There were periods of my life where I lost a significant amount of weight and suddenly received attention and validation that felt confusing. People treated me differently. It made me realize how much society rewards transformation on the outside while often ignoring what’s happening internally.
What do you think shaped that experience?
I’m a bariatric patient, and choosing surgery was one of the tools I added to my health journey while working toward becoming a healthier version of myself. That experience brought both physical and emotional changes, and it deeply shaped the way I viewed my body and my worth.
Thirteen years later, I’ve regained over 40 pounds, and I’ve recently been considering GLP medications as another possible tool to support my health journey. That decision feels like a balance between the long-term health implications of slow weight gain versus the potential concerns and unknowns surrounding the medications themselves.
At the same time, I was navigating stress, anxiety, burnout, and eventually sobriety. My body became both something I judged and something I relied on to keep carrying me through difficult seasons.
Photography unexpectedly became part of that journey too. Through photos, I began learning to see beauty in vulnerability, emotion, softness, aging, and imperfection instead of only perfection. Even while gathering photos for this project, I realized how difficult it was to find full-body pictures of myself because I’ve spent so many years uncomfortable being photographed that way.
It was also hard to find unedited photos. That realization alone said a lot to me about my relationship with my body and how long I’ve been trying to control the way I’m seen.
How did those experiences influence the way you saw yourself or your body over time?
For a long time, I viewed my body almost like a project—something to improve, manage, criticize, or control. Even during moments where I looked “better” externally, I often felt disconnected internally. I spent years chasing confidence through appearance when what I was really searching for was peace and acceptance.
As I’ve gotten older, through much self-reflection, I’ve started understanding that my body has carried me through grief, heartbreak, anxiety, change, reinvention, and healing. It deserved compassion long before I ever gave it any.
I never really thought of myself as a “girly” girl growing up, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve embraced my own version of femininity and womanhood. I enjoy looking professional at work or feeling “pretty” or “cute” when I go out, but I also love having my hair up, being makeup-free, and living in comfortable clothes. Part of healing for me has been realizing that confidence and femininity do not have to look one specific way.
I still struggle sometimes with the difference between the woman I feel like I am and the woman I see in photos. I catch myself wanting to use filters or edit pictures—not necessarily to look like someone else, but to make the image feel more like the woman I see in the mirror instead of the one the camera lens captures.
Where are you now in your relationship with your body?
I’m in a much more honest place than I used to be. Not perfect—just honest.
There are still hard days. I still struggle with comparison, aging, anxiety, hormonal changes, and wanting to feel comfortable in my own skin. But I no longer want to punish my body into becoming someone else.
More than anything, I want to be healthy—mind, body, and soul. I want a long, peaceful, healthy life. My goals are no longer rooted in chasing perfection or someone else’s idea of beauty. My ideal body today is one where I feel good, move well, feel healthy, and feel comfortable in my own skin.
I’m learning to listen to my body instead of fight it, and that healing isn’t about finally loving every part of yourself all the time. Sometimes it’s about learning to love yourself as fully as you can in that moment, and leaning on your family, friends, and community on the days when that feels harder to do.
What are you still navigating or unlearning?
I’m still unlearning the idea that my worth is tied to appearance, accomplishments, or how much I can carry for other people.
And maybe that’s what healing really is: not becoming someone entirely new, but finally allowing yourself to exist as you are—with honesty, softness, and compassion.
Creative expression has also become an important part of Mardi’s healing journey. Through songwriting and music projects, she continues exploring themes of identity, vulnerability, self-worth, growth, and what it means to exist more honestly within yourself. Below are a few pieces she shared that continue that exploration through sound, storytelling, and vulnerability.
Full Story (As Written by Mardi)
My name is Mardi, though some people know me as “The Michigan Girl.” I’m the business owner behind Michigan Girl, Michigan Music, and Michigan Small Business Solutions, while also maintaining a full-time career of over 30 years. I’m an entrepreneur, Michigan traveler, dog-mom, Peer Recovery Coach, music lover, and creative writer of blogs, music, and soon, my first book. I also serve within the recovery community through the Mid Michigan Recovery Services Alumni Committee, Lifeboat Addiction Recovery Services Board of Directors, and Face Addiction Now in Ingham County.
Over the years I’ve worn many hats—daughter, wife, step-mom, caregiver, entrepreneur, supporter, and often the person everyone leaned on—but underneath all of that, I’ve also been someone trying to figure out who I am. A lot of my healing journey has involved reconnecting with myself, my emotions, and my body after years of disconnecting from all three.
I became aware of my body at a young age, but that awareness intensified as I got older and moved through many major life changes. I was always conscious of how women are expected to look, and how quickly worth can become tied to appearance, weight, aging, or desirability.
One area where I especially felt pressure to “look” a certain way was professionally—both in my career and while building my public-facing businesses and brands. There’s often an expectation for women to appear polished, confident, attractive, energetic, and put together at all times, even when internally they may be overwhelmed or struggling.
There were periods of my life where I lost a significant amount of weight and suddenly received attention and validation that felt confusing. People treated me differently. It made me realize how much society rewards transformation on the outside while often ignoring what’s happening internally.
I’m also a bariatric patient, and choosing surgery was one of the tools I added to my health journey while working toward becoming a healthier version of myself. That experience brought both physical and emotional changes, and it deeply shaped the way I viewed my body and my worth. Thirteen years later, I’ve regained over 40 pounds, and I’ve recently been considering GLP medications as another possible tool to support my health journey. That decision feels like a balance between the long-term health implications of slow weight gain versus the potential health concerns and unknowns surrounding GLP medications themselves.
At the same time, I was navigating stress, anxiety, burnout, and eventually sobriety. My body became both something I judged and something I relied on to keep carrying me through difficult seasons.
For a long time, I viewed my body almost like a project—something to improve, manage, criticize, or control. Even during moments where I looked “better” externally, I often felt disconnected internally. I spent years chasing confidence through appearance when what I was really searching for was peace and acceptance.
As I’ve gotten older, through much self-reflection, I’ve started understanding that my body has carried me through grief, heartbreak, anxiety, change, reinvention, and healing. It deserved compassion long before I ever gave it any.
I never really thought of myself as a “girly” girl growing up, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve embraced my own version of femininity and womanhood. I enjoy looking professional at work or feeling “pretty” or “cute” when I go out, but I also love having my hair up, being makeup-free, and living in comfortable clothes. Part of healing for me has been realizing that confidence and femininity do not have to look one specific way.
Photography unexpectedly became part of that journey too. Through photos, I began learning to see beauty in vulnerability, emotion, softness, aging, and imperfection instead of only perfection. Even while gathering photos for this project, I realized how difficult it was to find full-body pictures of myself because I’ve spent so many years uncomfortable being photographed that way. It was also hard to find unedited photos. That realization alone said a lot to me about my relationship with my body and how long I’ve been trying to control the way I’m seen.
I still struggle sometimes with the difference between the woman I feel like I am and the woman I see in photos. I catch myself wanting to use filters or edit pictures—not necessarily to look like someone else, but to make the image feel more like the woman I see in the mirror instead of the one the camera lens captures.
I’m in a much more honest place than I used to be. Not perfect—just honest. There are still hard days. I still struggle with comparison, aging, anxiety, hormonal changes, and wanting to feel comfortable in my own skin. But I no longer want to punish my body into becoming someone else.
More than anything, I want to be healthy—mind, body, and soul. I want a long, peaceful, healthy life. My goals are no longer rooted in chasing perfection or someone else’s idea of beauty. My ideal body today is one where I feel good, move well, feel healthy, and feel comfortable in my own skin.
I’m learning to listen to my body instead of fight it, and that healing isn’t about finally loving every part of yourself all the time. Sometimes it’s about learning to love yourself as fully as you can in that moment, and leaning on your family, friends, and community on the days when that feels harder to do.
I’m still unlearning the idea that my worth is tied to appearance, accomplishments, or how much I can carry for other people. And maybe that’s what healing really is: not becoming someone entirely new, but finally allowing yourself to exist as you are with honesty, softness, and compassion.